Oct. 26 - I Left to visit some of my family and some high school friends that i had not seen in over 40 years in south Ontario
Oct. 30 - Lorraine went to Emergency department of the hospital, with daughter Nikki, Lorraine not feeling well. They did a CT scan and found a lump 10cm big in Lorraine's pelvis area.
Oct. 31 - Evening, I picked up emails and there was one from Lorraine telling me she had been to the Emergency department.
Oct. 31 - I tried calling home, no answer, Lorraine goes out to her TOPS meeting Monday evenings.
Nov. 1 - Talked to Lorraine and she told she was doing ok, and not to return a day early.
Nov. 3 - Got back to Timmins (happy to be home again)
Nov. 5 - Took Lorraine back to Emergency department, she was not doing well at all, saw a Dr. Houston, he put a drain for her bladder in and Lorraine felt a bit better, Dr. Houston made an appointment for us to see a Dr. Shehata at the NEOCC (North east Ontario cancer centre) in Sudbury on Wed Nov.9th
Nov.8 - Drove to Sudbury in daylight, highway #144 is bad for winter travel, we stayed at the Fenton's Bed and Breakfast again, but for one night this time.
Nov. 9 - Went to NEOCC and saw Doctor Shehata he found that Lorraine's bowel was almost blocked by the growth, and he asked us if we wanted to stay in Sudbury or go back to Timmins to have an emergency Colostomy, we decided to come back to Timmins. Had to drive back to Timmins in a snow storm.
Nov. 11 - Lorraine admitted to TDH (Timmins and district Hospital)
Nov. 12 - Emergency Colostomy done by Doctor Voojgave, Lorraine seems to be doing better.
Nov. 15 - Lorraine put on blood thickeners so that a needle biopsy can be done.
Nov. 17 - Lorraine put on Heparin to thin her blood as she has developed blood clots in her legs from being on the blood thickeners. No needle biopsy can be done.
Nov. 18 - Lorraine has gone into a kind of stupor and is not eating very well, and is in a lot of pain in her lower back and legs. The colostomy is not working very well either.
Nov. 22 - Lorraine put on IV feeding as she is not eating now.
Nov. 28 - Lorraine taken off the Heparin to allow her blood to thicken a bit before the colostomy can redone.
Nov. 29 - Doctor had to redo the colostomy
and tried to do a biopsy, and urologist tried to put tubes in passage between
kidney and bladder, Doctors unable to do either, growth is so big it is attached
and pressing on other things in Lorraines pelvic area.
Nov. 30 Lorraine acting crazy, thinks the nurses are trying to kill her and are carrying guns and that the water is poisoned so dont do not drink it, and there is nothing coming out of her bladder. She is back on the Heparin again.
Dec. 2 - Lorraine has pain in lower back and legs again. Lorraine taken by Air Ambulance to North Bay for emergency double Nephrostomy(kidney tubes). Lorraines first plane trip. Supposed to be flown back that night, but as they could only get one tube in it was decided to keep Lorraine in North bay for observation.
Dec. 3 - Unable to get back to Timmins because of a snow storm in Timmins.
Dec. 4 - Flown back to Timmins, still in a lot of pain and not eating.
Dec 18 - Lorraine taken by Air Ambulance to Sudbury NEOCC for radiation treatments.
Dec. 19 - I drove to Sudbury. Lorraine had CT scan and Biopsy done. The growth was now over 300mm. I was staying at the Fentons B&B again.
Dec. 20 - Lorraine had the first of 5 radiation treatments to be done. I was told by the doctor that all they could do was try and make Lorraine a bit more comfortable for the short time she had left.
Dec. 23 - Lorraine had last radiation treatment and then flown back to Timmins and I drove back. Told Lorraines children what the doctor in Sudbury had told me, and I said that she would not be with us at the end of February and most likely she would be gone by the end of January.
Dec. 25 - All of Lorraines family came to the hospital to visit and I had Christmas dinner at Nicoles and then back to the hospital.
Dec. 29 - Lorraine signed a codicil to her will giving me some of her estate.
Dec. 30 - Lorraine asked me to marry her, so that we would be married before the end of the year and I would be able to collect the Allowance for the death of a spouse. Smart lady as always. I disscovered afterwards that Lorraine had already talked to her kids about this before she asked me to marry her.
Jan. 2 - Asked Dr Raymond about taking Lorraine off the heparin he said no and gave her Ritalin to and try and get her out of the daze she was in. Doctor advised if there was a Power of Attorney it should be started. Advised Nicole to do this.
Jan. 6 - Lorraine had a change of doctors and she was taken of the Heparin. I advised that Lorraines children that they should go on the next day, Saturday the 7th of January, to see the funeral home to arrange for the funeral. I also told them that I was going to take a day from being at the hospital on the Sunday. I had been spending 12 to 16 hours a day with Lorraine since the start of her hospital stay on November 11th, and I was getting burnt out.
Jan. 7 - Children arranged funeral, and came
to the hospital after dinner, I said my good bye to Lorraine and said, I
love you sweetheart and she replied
Love to as well These were the last words that we would speak to each other face to face.
Jan. 8 - I took the day off and the kids arrived at the house about 5:30pm with police officer and told me that Lorraine did not want to see me again and they also wanted the car. I advised the kids to wait 2 weeks before doing anything drastic.
Jan.16 - Nikki arrived at house with many police officers to search for guns and was told by Nicole that Lorraine was going to be coming home and that I was had to leave the house within two days with all my possotions, and I was removed from house and had to stay in a motel for two nights while I made arrangements for somewhere to live.
Jan. 18 - Had a rented truck and moved my things out of Lorraines house and moved to south Ontario to live with my son Robert.
Feb. 3 - Lorraine died in hospital.
Feb. 7 - Lorraine's funeral in Timmins.
Since that time I have been accused of many things, such as abusing Lorraine, having fire arms in the house, sleeping in the basement, coercing Lorraine to change her will and trying to see Lorraine after the visit of the kids and the police officer on January the 8th.
Let me answer these accusations,
1 - I never abused Lorraine except by maybe loving her so much, but her late husband did abuse her on at least two occasations, and one of them he was picked up by the police and put in a jail cell.
2 - I have never owned a fire arm, and I don't like them, but her late husband had them, and at one time was sleeping with a rifle by his bed.
3 - The only time I slept in the basement was one very hot summer night when Lorraine and I tried to sleep in her old bed that was in the basement where it was a bit cooler, but we found that the bed was so uncomfortable that we never used it again, But her late husband had slept in the basement for a period time before he died.
4 - Talking to Lorraine about her will, yes I did talk to her about that, but that was in the spring of 2005 when she was going to change it so that I would get the whole estate except for small amounts of cash for Richard and Nicole, and nothing for Marc. She was very upset with Mark at this time as he had only managed to visit his mother twice in 2004, once on Mothers Day and also at Christmas. Also he had not replied to emails that Lorraine had sent, but then he never got them as he had changed his email address and not told his mother of the change. This fact can be confirmed by Lorraine's friends.
5 - The only time I went back to the hospital after the visit of the kids and the police officer on January 8 was to go and talk to the head day nurse about the picture that I was going to give to the nursing staff of the unit and find out what she would like on the plaque on the picture, oh and of course I did ask her how Lorraine was doing. I don't think that can be called harassing Lorraine. I did ask Nicole to take the picture to the hospital but the last time i checked she had never done so, so i dont know who has the picture now.
At the funeral there was no mention of me or my relationship with Lorraine but as they did not have any recent pictures of there mother they did take copies from my web site to use in the computer slide show that was showing in the funeral home.
Maybe someone from NothernTel Mobility should have a look at my cell phone account #506323286, because when I called them while I was in Timmins for the funeral to give them my new address I found out that it had already been changed at Nicole Mantha's request, without my permission or knowledge on January 23, 2006 and that it also been changed on January 17, 2006 again without my permission or knowledge but I was not told who had requested that change.
If you remember on November 28 Lorraine was taken off the Heparin and two days later she was acting crazy, saying the nurses were trying to kill her and the water was poisoned and yelling for help. Now lets move forward to January 6 and while I was not at the hospital Lorraine started telling people about things that I had done, but these were all things that her late husband had done, and she has been on heavy does of Morphine for two months now to try and make her more comfortable with the pain in her lower back and legs.
Lorraine and her family have a rare blood disorder and I have since found out that there is a rare side effect to the use of Heparin, it causes sever pain in the lower back and legs and brings on a case of Malaise, or a feeling of not wanting to eat and not wanting to be left alone, all these symptoms Lorraine had displayed and when she was taken off the Heparin at my request she did not have the pain or the malaise any more but by that time her mind was totally mixed up and she could not separate what her late husband had done and my name.
Nicole I hope you are happy now, as I have decided not to pursue a legal course of action to have Lorraine real wishes complied with, because I know it is something that Lorraine would not have wanted me to do. But I also know that you did not comply with her real wishes and that is something that you will have to live with the rest of your life.
Marc you have to live with the knowledge that you treated your mother in a manner that upset her enough that she was going to change her will and leave you nothing, but I got her to not do that and to just leave it the way it was. This fact can be confirmed by Lorraine's friends.
Did you children know that your mother was going to leave Timmins in the spring of 2001 and move to Nova Scotia to live with me, and this would have pleased me very much, but I also know that she would not have been happy to be living so far away from her family and friends. After much talking we decided that when the time was right I would come and stay in Timmins and did so starting in August of 2002. This fact can also be confirmed by Lorraine's friends.
I am writing this on the one year anniversary of Lorraine's death, and there is not a day that goes by that I do not think about her and the wonderful time we had together. She will live forever in my heart and I will cherish all the memories of the time we had together.
As Mr. Spock would say
Live long and prosper